"Your momma's so fat, she made the Big Five the Big Six!"

The safari was an adventure.

We got up at 6:45 so we had time to grab breakfast. Everyone was supposed to meet at our hostel at 8:30 to get the safari cars. We were packed; excited. We split up into three cars: 6 in the first, 5 in the second, 6 in the third. I was in a car with Mara, Sara, Carolyn, Peery, and Rachel. Our driver's name was John.

First thing John says to us: "Do you like gospel music?" There's a resounding "No!" We're all in the mood for something a little more fun.

Everything is paid for in the safari fee except for beer. So we plan on stopping for crates of beer. John takes us to ShopRite. Apparently crates of beer turned into really expensive individual cans of beer. We grab some cans and start paying for them, when another one of the drivers tells us we're stopping somewhere else for actual crates. Oh, great. The woman has already rung us up for all the beer and we wait for about 10 minutes for her manager to come and void everything. They have to do each can individually. Pole (sorry). We just get some snacks and some cider and climb back into the safari car. I have managed to cut my leg on something--not sure what. This happens a lot during the safari.

We stop for crates of beer. We're told it will be 27,000 TSh (about 23US$) for 25 beers. Not too bad; we get some money back when we return the bottles. But then, the man inside tells us we have to bay 72,000 TSh. WTF?! Serious confusion there. After a period of time, where we all decide the beer is not worth it, we get two crates for the price of 27,000 TSh each. Finally we get on the road.

The drive is long and we're having fun until the radio goes out and John puts in his gospel music. None of us said anything on the drive, but when we finally reached the park and John said, "We must turn the music off here," we all sighed with relief.

We got to see tons of animals. Giraffes were 5 feet from our car and we got fantastic pictures of them. Zebras, water buffalo, wildabeest, warthogs, hippos, giraffes, all of it. We even saw two giraffes mating. And, yes, we took pictures. What else would college students such as ourselves do in that situation?

On the first day, I somehow managed to burn the skin off my elbow. I guess it was from putting my elbow on the roof of our safari car, but I definitely did not feel that happening. It was pretty disgusting. When I was finally able to clean it that night, it stung so bad. It was so dirty.

At night, we went to a campsite not far from the first park (Lake Manyara) we went to. We had the pop-up style tents we use in the States for camping. But there were legitimate twin beds inside the tents. I ended up in a tent on my own at the edge of the campsite, facing away from everyone. Not happening. After dinner, Meg and I moved my mattresss into the tent she shared with Peery.

We had a delicious dinner, but I wasn't feeling too well or hungry again. I at least ate some potatoes. After, we sat around a campfire and just hung out. There was a creepy Maasai man hanging around in the dark behind us. I THINK he worked at the campsite, because he would sometimes come by and stoke the fire. But he usually only threw one tiny stick in. We're not sure he knew what he was doing. After, he would disappear into the darkness on the edge of the campsite. Creepy.

Meg, Peery, and I went to bed. Some had already gone to sleep (since we had to be up at 6 AM for breakfast) and some hadn't. We passed out. I'd been dead asleep for about an hour when someone shook our tent. Sana, Michael, Adam, and Jena were running around the campsite scaring people. The three of us were so pissed because we'd been out and couldn't get back to sleep. But it was really funny to listen to them scaring other people. We finally fell back asleep and woke up about 30 minutes after our alarm actually went off. Even so, we were still the first people at breakfast.

We all climbed back into the safari cars and headed for Ngorongoro Crater. It was amazingly beautiful. We say lions, elephants, gazelles, black rhinos (only from afar), hippos, hyenas, zebras, water buffalo, wildabeast, and more. It was so awesome. Two lions were two feet from our car. I could almost touch them. We saw all of the Big Five (elephants, lions, water buffalo, rhinos, and leopards) except for the leopards.

The second day is when our "your momma" joke was developed. We had a good time with it.

The second day was also when our car got a surprise from Meg, Michael, Jena, Sana, and Adam's car. They kept telling us they had this wonderful surprise for us. I guessed mooning/flashing. I was right. But only one of us actually saw Michael mooning us as their car drove past. They thought it was so hilarious so we all pretended like we didn't know anything had happened. All day they were sad we hadn't seen it. We had a good time with that. We told them the truth later and it was great to watch their reactions.

We got back from the safari at about 1830. We showered, got dressed for dinner. There was a rugby team from Dar staying at our hostel and they were already drunk when we got home. They were going out to Maasai Camp (a club popular with mzungu) and wanted us to go along in their 60-person bus. They were fun but we wanted to eat and the fun doesn't start at MC until about 11 PM. It was only 7 PM. We told them we might meet them.

We went to a couple places for dinner. Mara, Rachel Peery, Sara, and I ate at our hostel. The food is good and cheap. After, we waited for the others to get back. By the time they did, none of us were feeling like going out. But finally, about 5 of us decided we were going to go out.

Maasai Club was bumping. We ran into the rugby players. They were too drunk to bother with. So we hung out with each other and danced. We went outside to get away from all the grabby Tanzanians. One named Zebra followed us out. I told him our names were Simba, Rafiki, Zazu, and Nala. We also told him we were all married. He still wouldn't leave us alone. So Jena pulled this random Brit over and told him to pretend he was married to all of us. It was hilarious. John (the Brit) even went into a detailed explanation of Mormonism to Zebra. Zebra still wouldn't leave. Finally, John just told him to buzz off.

We hung out the rest of the night and had a good time. We got home at about 3:30 in the morning. Bad, seeing as how we had to get up at 6:30 to get breakfast before our bus ride back to Babati. But we got it, came back to our homestay, showered, ate, went to sleep.

And that was our week in Arusha.

"Pour one out for Etta" Part 2

Back to the fun we had during our week off...

WEDNESDAY

The five of us woke up (Meg, Sana, Mara, Peery, and I) and went to grab breakfast at this place called Chocolate Temptations in the Western-style strip mall of little restaurants by ShopRite. We had little pieces of tea cake and either coffee or tea. We had woken up late and just relaxed in the morning. Then we went back to the hostel in order to get our stuff together and to allow Mara to check for a package from her parents she's been waiting on for awhile.

At about 12:30, we got a bus to Moshi. The central bus stand in Arusha is CRAZY. We tried to gather ourselves and then we just dove in. Everything we read in the guide book happened. People were hassling us left and right to use their travel company to get on this bus to buy this pack of biscuits. It was insane. We got to the middle and turned around to find the first guy that told us he was going to Moshi. We paid about 2US$ to get the bus. We got seats in the last row, I took one by the window in the second to last row.

The ride was really nice. The scenery was beautiful. I kept the window open, even though it was super windy, because it began to smell like BO in the bus. But my hair was getting tangled, so I wrapped my head in my scarf. I felt like I looked really cool. Definitely like a traveler. :)

After we got to Moshi, we headed for the Coffee Shop. This is supposed to be one of the best places for coffee in the country. It was way to hot to have coffee, so I got some iced tea with lemon (which turned out to be lime with dirt on it) and some people got iced coffee (which comes with ice cream--how wonderful!). Grace and Frank met up with us briefly, but we had things we wanted to do so we didn't hang out too much.

We got a room in the Kilimanjaro Backpackers Hotel (the equivalent of the Arusha Backpackers Hotel). The set-up with the 4 beds was much nicer than Arusha. I was feeling a little ill so I took a nap and the others walked around for about half an hour. At 1730, we went to the rooftop restaurant of the Kindoroko Hotel. We were told this was a good place to see Kili. The clouds mostly clear out around 1800 so we could actually see the top. We got some pictures; not fantastic since it was pretty hazy, but still awesome. We sat up there and watched the sunset and had some beers.

I had been feeling pretty ill all day and hadn't eaten much of anything. But on the way into the Kindoroko, we had noticed an Indian restaurant next door that was cooking the most delicious looking and smelling things on grills outside. We checked it out on the way out. They were cooking things called Zanzibar Pizzas and we were told we had to try them. We all ordered one. They are cooked with something that looks like won-ton (however that's spelled) dough. There is a mixture of beef, peppers, onions and who knows that other delicious substances that is put in the middle of the flattened dough. Then an egg is cracked over it and the dough is folded over and placed on the flat grill. When it's done, you have the most amazing food you will ever eat. The outside is crispy, the inside amazing. The egg has been fried. It was the best thing we've had since being in Tanzania, no lie. Outside the restaurant, they were also cooking beef kabobs and chickens, so I decided to order a plate of all of it. Best decision I've ever made. The chicken was tender and delicious and had a hint of cinammon--not what I was expecting it to taste like, but I was definitely not disappointed. Meg tried some and we decided that this was not the "walking chicken" we see everywhere. The walking chicken is the chicken that just hangs out on the street and forages for food--most chickens in TZ are walking chickens. The chicken at this restaurant (called the Taj Mahal, by the way) was definitely raised to be eaten. It was amazing. The beef kabobs were also fantastic. The beef was super tender and had been spiced amazingly. I loved it all so much, I ordered a second plate. We got pictures.

After I finished eating, and everyone else finished watching me eat, we headed to the restaurant at Kili Backpackers. We got some drinks and ordered more food (of course). All we do is eat and drink when we have some free time. It's amazing. We had a nice relaxing night, which we don't have often.

We finished our evening and then headed to bed, where we proceeded to journal and read. Apparently, I finished journaling, turned over, and passed out. I didn't remember doing that in the morning, but it happened.

For breakfast, we headed up the restaurant at Kili Backpackers, since it's free. But at Arusha Backpackers, we got free eggs. At Kili Backpackers, we only got free bread. Lame. So we headed up to the Coffee Shop. Most people just got coffee. Sana and I ordered a cheese and tomato omellette and a cappuccino each. The most delicious omellette ever. It helped that salt was available (we are quite salt deprived in our homestays). Then we hung out and read and journaled until about 10, when we went to the bus station.

We got a bus right away. It was empty. Bad idea. They drove around looking for people to fill up the bus. We started helping them out by yelling "Arusha!" out the window. I think we made it worse. Finally we left Moshi, but we stopped about every 10 minutes to pick up people. A 1 hour bus ride turned into 3 hours. We were not happy. At one point, they put 6 people in my row for 5. I was so pissed. Some guy was practically sitting on top of me for an hour. When we finally reached the bus station in Arusha, we just all got off the bus and took off in a straight, angry line for our hostel.

Everyone was back from rafting earlier in the week, but we didn't feel like dealing with them. It was a bad day because we were so frustrated with our bus ride. But we relaxed for awhile and then met up with people for dinner at our hostel (though almost everyone from rafting was staying at Arusha Backpackers). It ended up being a decent night. We wanted to get to bed early because we had to prepare for safari-ing the next day.

Now, to explain the "Pour one out for Etta." Mara purchased a shirt at the second hand market that is a family reunion shirt for two families: one on the front, one on the back. Both reunions are in memory of some dead person. Etta is the dead person on the front. She was 101 years old. So, somehow, we now always say "Pour one out for Etta" when we drink. Don't remember how it started, but it did. So we poured one out for Etta during our week in Arusha.

"Pour one out for Etta!"

Our week off has been the best week so far in Tanzania. We've been in and around Arusha. I'll try to give you the fun details without making you all wish you were here.

Mara and I left our homestay on Saturday morning at 0730. We met Peery, Sara, and Sana at the bus stand and waited for everyone else. One of our coordinators, Gerald, spotted us and led us to the bus. We got to choose the first seats, which is always nice. Mara and I are bus partners so we sat next to each other in the front of the bus. Then we just hung out and waited for everyone else to show up. It took us about an hour to leave--that's normal.

The bus ride was about three bumpy hours. At one point, we pulled the bus over for a bathroom stop. Then we were told we all had to get off the bus. The message was, "Fire! Off!" I'm not sure where the fire was, but we all got off. The bus was leaking gas, I think. It was leaking some sort of liquid, anyway. In a few minutes, we were told everything was okay, even though I saw the driver and the two bus workers sitting on the side of the road and doing nothing to the bus...

The SIC truck also broke down and we had to pick them up. We passed them and the bus couldn't stop on the hill so we went up the other side and had to turn around and come back. So funny. Then we picked the others up. There weren't enough seats for them, but we were only about 40 minutes from our destination, so it wasn't too bad.

When we got to Arusha, we pulled up outside of Arusha Backpackers. We were supposed to be staying at Meru House. Okay. Then we were told that where Meru costs aprroximately 5US$/night, Backpackers costs 10US$. We were all PISSED. It's not much money and Backpackers is really nice (breakfast included) but a lot of this not telling us what we're paying for until we get there shit has been happening. For example, I was told I HAD to arrive the day before the program started. So I did. Then I was told I had to pay for my stay in the hostel that night!! WTF? If I'd known that, I'd have come the next day, like some people did. Apparently we didn't have to be there the night before. And then we are told about 3 days before our vacation week that we have to pay for our bus ride back to Arusha from Babati AND for all of our food and hostel fees. Again, WTF?! I didn't bring money for this!! I was told living expenses were paid for. SIC won't even pay for our water this week! My response from Claire (not my favorite person, by the way) when I asked if she could put our water in the truck for us was, "You bring what you can carry, the rest you have to buy." Bull shit. That is not what I was told I'd be given. I was told my living expenses and my bottled water would be paid for. Not okay that I'm told differently when I get to the country and only two days before I have to pay for it all!! Right now, a lot of us are having trouble getting money out of the banks and stuff. Who knows why. So I currently do not have enough money to pay for another night in my hostel. The ATM told me my bank wouldn't let me get money out. I checked and there didn't seem to be any problem with withdrawing here; I've done it before. But I got less out last time, so I will try getting less out again later. I can always go into the bank. Not too big of a deal. Sorry for the rant, but it is very frustrating to have about $75 worth of living expenses thrown at you at the last minute. And that $75 is with us only eating 1.5 meals a day and surviving on day-old dollar bread the rest of the time. Such bull shit. Okay, done ranting and on to the really exciting parts of our week off.

We got into Arusha at about 1 PM. After we dropped our stuff off at Backpackers, some of us went to grab lunch at the hamburger stand we'd been hearing a lot about. It really is just a stand; a cart on the side of the road. It's also called "Wraps." But it is the BEST hamburger I've had in this country. I can't say best food because I had even better food later on in the week. But they ground the beef up with fresh herbs and spices. It comes with tomato sauce (sort of like ketchup, but not), onions, cabbage, tomatoes and cucumbers. Weird, yes, but it makes a great combination. I take the cucumbers off because I hate them, but everything else is delicious.

After the burger stand, we went to the SIC office to pick up some books. Of course, I forgot to bring the one I meant to exchange, but that's fine. We paid our deposit for the safari (we leave tomorrow morning). Then we checked out a few things and headed to the hostel to hang out. Backpackers has this great restaurant and bar on the roof, so we went up to read and such. Then we got ready to go out to the group dinner (not paid for, of course) at Maasai Camp. Apparently this is a restaurant/bar/club where all the wazungu (foreigners) hang out. The pizza was amazing. The beer was a decent price but the other drinks were ridiculous. It costs 3,000 Tsh for a double shot of Captain Morgan. Granted this is only about 2.5US$, but still. You get really cheap when you're used to paying nothing. A coke was 1000 Tsh, which is usually about 500 Tsh. So that was expensive. We hung out, danced, drank, played pool. There was some drama in the group, which was pretty irritating when you're trying to have a fun time out. But overall my friends and I had a good time. We're definitely trying to go there again before we leave Arusha. We also ran into our guide from our bonding waterfall hike at the beginning of the trip.

Sunday, many people left to go rafting in Uganda on the Nile. Peery, Mara, and I moved into Meru House with the remaining people. We got a triple and one wall of our room was windows. We looked like we were in an observation room. Nice for lighting, but everyone would walk by and look in. We, along with Meg and Sana who also stayed behind, decided to start a blog all about hostel experiences. We're working on putting it up as soon as we get a few entries compiled. Quick tip for Meru: every single staff worker, male and female, is creepy. But the food is good and cheap.

We also checked out some markets and hung out. We heard about a movie theatre in town. Can't remember if we did much else; mostly we hung out and relaxed. We got some food at ShopRite, the most amazing supermarket in all of the universe.

Monday was a fantastic day. We woke up early and had eggs and toast at Meru. Toast is the best thing EVER. Then we went to the Rwanda War Crimes Tribunal. Arusha is the capital of East Africa (Rwanda, Tanzania, and other east African countries like to consider themselves one state) and so the trials were held at the Arusha International Conference Center. They were supposed to finish last summer, but they are going on until fall of this year. So, we decided to check it out. We went through security, where they took our passports as collateral and gave us United Nations visitors' passes. Awesome. We walked around looking for a good trial to watch and found one. But the guard told us there was a judgment taking place upstairs, so we went to that. There are windows from the observation room into the courtroom and visitors can listen to the case through headphones. They'd run out of headphones, so one of the staff members took us into an Authorized Only area and to another room, where we could watch on a screen and listen. We listened to the judge read out the charges on a man named Kilimanziro. It took a while. Then we watched him be sentenced to 30 years in prison (though they took out time for the 3 years, 7 months, and 14 days he's already served). He was charged with inciting the public to kill Tutsis, for bringing Tutsis to the football field and then bringing armed Hutus to kill them, and for beating a Tutsi. He never actually killed a Tutsi, but he incited the Hutus to kill Tutsi.

It was crazy to watch something like this happen. And everything he did happened so long ago. It was awesome to see the UN in action on a case like this. It's hard to believe we actually saw someone get sentenced for war crimes.

After the tribunal, we went to the second-hand market. We see some people walking around with crazy American t-shirts that they've picked up there, so we decided to get some ourselves. I got one weird one with serious gibberish on the back. Mara got one for a family reunion that is in memory of Etta something or other. Hilarious. Meg got one for the Bucktrout Funeral Home.

We also went to the craft market and got gifts for people. There was a lot of cool stuff, but we're all getting really cheap so it was hard to spend money. Peery, Mara, and I also took Meg and Sana to the hamburger stand so they could try it out.

We found a Western strip mall by the ShopRite. I got some real milk-based ice cream. Amazing. Then we all sat in a coffee shop and had some coffee and cake. We got some cheddar cheese slices at ShopRite and had cheese sandwiches for dinner in our room.

TUESDAY

Tuesday we went to visit one of the teaching partner's home. Saningo is Maasai, so we took a dalladalla (minibus) to a Maasai area. There was a huge market happening that day. There was also a cattle market happening. It was really awesome. Saningo's dad has four wives (not something we new so it was unexpected news). Sangino's mom is his first wife. Saningo and his sister look just like her and she is very pretty. We also met the third wife, who is pretty and super nice. Saningo's dad creeped me out a little at first (mostly he's very large and I think anyone with more than one wife would creep me out) but he's pretty cool. He bought us some sodas and then paid for us to visit the Snake Park and the Maasai Cultural Museum. We got to see some HUGE snakes and we held some little ones. We saw some baby crocodiles. I climbed into the bit to take pictures of them. AWESOME. The Maasai museum was hilariously bad. It showed scenes from Maasai life, but the statues were not at all like you see in the States. I wish I could have taken some pictures.

After this, we rode CAMELS! It was so cool. I was sitting on the first camel with Saningo's sister. The camel in the back wasn't having a good day. As soon as the camels stood up, the back camel's nose was right by my butt. He decided to take a chunk out of my ass. The way he did it, I'm pretty sure he was plotting it for a while. It didn't hurt but it was hilarious. I got some lovely pictures of him.

Saningo's dad and moms provided us with lunch after. It was the first meat I've had in the country (aside from the trusty burgers). I'm always hesitant for local meat. It was tough and hard to chew but actually quite delicious and up to American standards.

We had to head back into town soon after this so we could get home before dark. Then we decided to check out the cinema. We wanted to see Confessions of a Shopaholic but we got there too late. A ton of us had already seen Angels & Demons, so we didn't see that. Instead, we got a bagel and some coffee at a coffee shop. It was good, but I wasn't feeling well. Then we went to another food place and sat outside. All the waiters for all the restaurants in the cinema/mall brought us menus and we just chose what we wanted.

I'm going to have to write about Wednesday/Thursday in Moshi and about the safari at a later date. No time now. Been on here WAY too long and have to get more money out!

Check back in a few days! Unless I get eat by lions on our safari, of course!

Daily Life in the Homestay

The long awaited description of what we do on a daily basis:

0720 (this is 1:20 AM in Swahili time): Alarm goes off. Mara and I lie in bed and stare up at the mosquito net. No, we do not want to get up.

0730: Mara and I get up. Tie up the mosquito net. I check to see how many bites I received during the night and the day before. The probability of me getting malaria has increased exponentially since arriving in the homestay. I don't know why the mosquitos like me so much more here.

0735: Greet our family. "Shikamoo, mama." Get our hot water for bathing. We alternate who goes first. I usually receive a few more mosquito bites here. There's nothing I can do about it since I'm washing all the bug spray off. I wash my hair with shampoo every other Sunday or Monday. I occasionally get it wet in between to make it curlier and to get the dust out. Mara and I often drop our soap on the ground and have to go back later with our knives and dig it out. Without fail, someone in our family will use the choo to do #2 while we are showering. Yes, we can hear it. Yes, we can smell it. (The choo and the bathing room are in the same area and share a wall.)

0800: Breakfast. The first day in our homestay this seemed like a positive experience because we had chapati and delicious chai. We still have delicious chai, but now our mama gives us ever increasing amounts of what is called vitumbua (or however it's spelled). Loosely translated, these are saucer-shaped fried dough things that are so greasy we can feel our insides wince when our eyes see them. At first we hated the flavor. They grow on you. They have to since it's all we eat for breakfast. The burned ones are the best. We've slowly been eating fewer and fewer so our mama gives us less. It's hard because that's all we have to eat for breakfast. But we're trying.

0830-1230: What we do here depends on the day. On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, we now teach at an English Medium school. So we leave at 0830 and walk for about thirty minutes to a school way out of our districts and split up into groups of two and teach about HIV in English. It's actually nice to teach in English instead of translating into Swahili. On days when we don't have teachings in the morning, we usually hang out and read or go to the market/tailor or come to the internet cafe. Sometimes we schedule other teachings. We had one scheduled today but then Raymundi canceled. Both Mara and I are not at all sad he canceled (this is the guy who treats us like we don't exist).

1230-1300: We usually have lunch around here. The meal varies. If we get speans, we usually know we're having that for dinner. The same goes if we get potatoes or the potato/banana mixture in the lovely pink sauce. We don't mind for those. We mind for the speans.

1300-1330/1500: We do different things depending on the day. On Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays, we have a teaching at 1400. So we rest for a bit then head over at 1330. Other days we don't teach until 1500, right by our house. Rachel and Frank and Jarrod have lunch later than we do, so Mara and I often nap. I think we get the most sleep out of our entire group. Sometimes we read, but mostly we've eaten too much to do anything but go comatose. We're also working on getting our mama to feed us less food. I was losing weight when we got here, and now I'm gaining weight. Plus we eat a lot of carbs, which hold onto all the water we're drinking. Not a fun feeling. So we sleep it off.

1400-1700: We are teaching during these times. Sometimes teachings are good. Sometimes not so good. By the end of the week we are all really tired and burnt out. But we try to have good lessons.

1700-2000: We do a variety of things during this time. Sometimes we stop at the market to pick up ingredients for guacamole. Other times we stop at the tailor. We often meet up with people at the internet cafe. Once it starts getting dark, we usually head to Frank and Jarrod's for cassava. Their mama makes it outside to sell to people, so we buy a bunch, put some pilipili (pepper/sauce) on it, and eat and hang out. You can always find us there at that time of day. It's loads of fun. We play with the kids and just have a good time. Last night was so fantastic because many of the SIC employees were there and a few different groups came to hang out. There were tons of us and we were all having a good time. Frank and Jarrod's baba said he was really happy that we were all there; he really enjoys having us over. At about 1940, Mara and I head home for dinner.

2000: We usually eat dinner around this time. We have chai again (it's super sugary and delicious, but pretty sure we're all getting cavities drinking it). I have to limit myself to one cup anymore because it's too much liquid to have in your system. We hang out with our family for a little bit. We made the mistake of teaching them the thumb war the other day and now the kids always want to play when they see us! Leila is the friendliest and always excited to see us. She likes to teach us to read Swahili in the evenings and show us what she did in school.

2030: Mara and I head to our room. We've said goodnight to our family because we rarely do anything after this point. We hang in our room and read for a bit while our stomachs settle all the food and chai.

2130: We get ready for bed: go to the choo, brush our teeth, etc. Then we pull down the mosquito net and call it a night. This is also when the house comes alive and people are filling buckets with water from the tap outside our room. The random cousins and nephews that live with us do their laundry.

0200: The house is silent for a few hours. This is usually when Mara wakes up and has to pee really badly. Today, I woke up then and had to pee really badly. We try not to use the choo in the middle of the night. But sometimes you can't help but go. The nice thing about going at this time of night is that we don't have to cover our knees or our shoulders (both scandalous parts of the body). Usually we have to put in t-shirts and wrap khongas around us when we get up to go to the choo. But at night, no one's awake to see. It's a really liberating feeling to look at your knees anymore. You look down and say, "Who is this person?"

0430: The house wakes up again. If we're lucky, we don't hear it and we can sleep peacefully until 0730. If we're not, it wakes us up and we have to pull out our iPods to cover the noise.

0730: Start the day over again.

"They don't waste things here, so you know someone ate that banana."

I forgot to mention something from our lovely lunch on June 11. As we were all slap happy, Jarrod thought that the mamas who cooked our lunch would understand him if he said, "Donde la choo?" (Where is the bathroom? In both Spanish and Swahili.)

As we were teaching at the Maisaka B Athletic Club (MB A Club) the other day, there were many little boys running around. Rachel noticed that one had a hole in the crotch of his shorts. Nothing unusual. When we first met Jarrod and Frank's little brother, he was wearing a fuzzy pink sweater and we thought he was a girl. Then he stood up and he wasn't wearing any pants. So anyway, the boy with the hole in the crotch of his pants is sitting in the dirt. Meanwhile, we are doing a condom demonstration, so Rachel, Mara, and I are blocking the door and window so the kids can't see. Rachel turns around and says, "Oh my gosh, it is hanging out of his shorts. Gross! Please tell me when it's away!" So a few minutes later I look around to see if the kid is gone. Nope. Now he's using it to dig a hole in the dirt. I don't think we needed to worry about him seeing the condom demonstration.

Another little boy was later caught peeing a stream about 20 feet long.

We like to talk about the choo (toilet) here. Jarrod used Rachel's toilet the other day before we left for a teaching. He comes back and says, "Your choo is really nice aside from the fact that it doesn't have a door." Rachel looks a little shocked. "What are you talking about?!" she says. They go to check it out. Apparently what Jarrod had peed in was not the choo. It had a hole in the floor, but who knows what it's used for.

Our teaching yesterday morning fell through. So we were deciding what to do and we decided to go to the Rift Valley English Medium School, which is about 40 minutes away in Maisaka A (not our turf). But Frank had met a teacher there who was interested in having us teach. We went and apparently they were expecting us to come and teach that day. Weird because we hadn't talked about it at all. But we didn't have much time because we had to be back for lunch. So we talked with the headmaster and met Standards 4-7, who we can teach. It's going to be very interesting because we are going to teach only in English and we don't have to translate into Swahili. Weird! I'm kind of excited for it. We start on Monday morning! I'm really stoked to teach some kids. One of the kids in my house goes there and is in Standard 5. We didn't even know! It's sooo far away!

We were also supposed to teach at the mosque yesterday, but Beatrice (one of our translators) was MIA (apparently she went to the clinic to get her toe fixed, thanks for sharing) and Frank didn't want to go. No one had confirmed so he said no one would be there and he didn't want to go. He was tired so we kind of let it go. But we all felt bad about missing it. We had no translator though so we didn't have a choice.

So we went shopping instead. Just kidding. But I did go to the tailor to pick up a skirt I had dropped off a while ago. It's a wrap skirt and I LOVE IT! It's my favorite cut so far and I'm going to have to get more.

Last night a bunch of people stayed in town at a hostel and hung out. We went for a little bit, but didn't want to stay out too late because our family has to wait up for us. Sara was staying at Rachel's house since we weren't sure if we could have her stay at our's because of Bibi. But we hung out for a bit and learned some crazy stuff. There are a few hook-ups going on. It's a bit weird since we've only been here for 3 weeks and people are claiming they love each other. I've even got one of the teaching partners trying this on me. Clearly I'm not having any of that BS. It's ridiculous. But others are doing it and they are doing it just to have stories to tell their friends. "I hooked up with an African guy!" Really stupid. I didn't come to Africa for this. But fortunately I have friends who think the same thing and we go do fun Africa stuff. Like buy skirts. And make guacamole. Which we did again today for Rachel's family and then for Frank and Jarrod's family. They LOVED it!

Our teaching today was pretty uneventful. I was really tired and REALLY frustrated because they made us take pictures beforehand. Everyone wanted to take a picture with the mzungus. It was so irritating and I felt like I was an animal on display. It's not show and tell when the mzungus come to Africa. After about three pictures I just got up and left. It really put me in a bad mood. Especially since we were taking time out of our teaching to take these stupid pictures. I'm having a good time here but I can't wait to go somewhere where I am not a spectacle. Gah!!

Okay, all for now! As I said, a lot has happened in the last few days compared to others. Both good and bad stuff. Overall, having fun! Someone eat a bacon cheeseburger for me!! Maybe some In-n-Out, double double no onions or lettuce, fries, chocolate milkshake.

June 11--The Day That Will Live in Infamy

So I know I said I'd write about daily life in the homestay. But so much has happened the last few days that I have to write about it.

I don't know if I've ever mentioned the spaghetti (noodles, not the lovely pasta with marinara we have in the States) and beans combo. So, we enjoyed our first spaghetti dish with Mama Sisi/Sia (we finally figured out where her name comes from. Her daughter is Sia, so she goes by Mama Sia--Sia's mom--but when she cooks for us she likes to go by Mama Sisi--which means 'our mom') during orientation. Then a couple of days ago, Mama Ali made it for Mara and I. We look at it and I say, "I wish I had some Blue Band [butter/margarine stuff]. And maybe some Parmesan." We're eating it. It's really plain. So we mix the beans with the pasta. I mean, it's not the best thing we've ever had here. Then we get home after a really long and frustrating day. And we're nervous about having ugale (corn puddy stuff that is also not very pleasant but Tanzanians love it). We look in the dish. Spaghetti and beans. When I put it in on my plate, I honestly cannot even think about eating it. I look at Mara and say, "I don't think I can put this in my mouth without throwing up." Mara felt the same way. That's how bad it was. So now we joke about it. When we tell stories, people sometimes get confused and we often get the question, "What is a spaghetti bean?" because they think it's one type of food. No no. Our group now calls the entire meal a Spean.

I know everyone knows about Build-A-Bear. Well, Ramadan, Frank and Jarrod's little brother (about 1), was caught wearing these tiiiiiiny jean shorts the other day. They don't even cover his butt all the way. But at one point he turns around and we notice this hole in the back. It's for a bear tail. Rachel looks at it and says, "I worked at Build-a-Bear for a year and a half. Those are bear shorts." It was the funniest thing. We cracked up everytime we saw Ramadan the rest of the day. Poor kid. He had no idea.

Our bibi (grandmother) was in the hospital a few days ago. When Mara and I came back to the house in the evening, Mama Ali told us that bibi had to return to the hospital and get her eye removed. This was all said in pantomime of course, us not knowing Kiswahili. Please just imagine someone miming an eye being removed. Somehow we found out that bibi is diabetic and it has something to do with that. Not sure what, but it does. Mama Ali took us to see bibi in her room. She's lying in bed with half of her head wrapped. Really creepy. I don't think I'd ever want to get my eye removed in Tanzania. So the next day, bibi goes to the hospital in the morning. We see her sitting up, her head is wrapped and one eye is covered. We go out to teach and come back in the evening, around 5. Bibi is back and sitting up and seems pretty lively. Her head is wrapped still, but this time in cloth and not a bandage. Weird, considering she just got her eye taken out. We find out later that bibi didn't actually have her eye taken out. They just needed to clean it...

Yesterday we had the most ridiculous day teaching. It's really hard to put into words. We met at Rachel's house at 9 to meet up with a guy for a teaching at 10. He shows up at 9:30 and says he'll come back with a car to take us, since we are going far. An hour later, he returns. So we leave Rachel's at 10:30 when we were supposed to be teaching at 10. We get to Nangara Secondary School, way out of our boundary, and this guy Raymundi or so I hear his name is, sits us down on some steps and says to wait, people weren't expecting us to teach. WTF? He arranged it! Frank says, "I think the dissemination of information was poor." No kidding. So we sit for a while before R comes back for Frank, Jarrod, and Rachel (he has a weird obsession with her). He tells the rest of us we can't go anywhere and we should stay. Excuse me? I'm a teacher, too, sir. About 30 minutes later he returns for us. He's speed walking ahead, while Mara has a bad knee. Then he turns around and asks us if we are tired and that's why we are slow. Excuse me? No. We meet up with the others and Rachel says they didn't even do anything. They were just sitting in a random room... Ok. So we go to a class to teach. The kids are about 4 years younger than they were supposed to be so we have to change our entire lesson plan. So irritating. It was so choppy. Everyone was really frustrated with it. Mara and I were frustrated because this guy R kept ignoring us and then he started teaching our lesson at one point when Frank and Jarrod left to get rid of some kids hanging around outside. It's not his lesson! And of course BT isn't translating anything for us so we have no idea what's going on.

So we finish this lesson at 1 PM. Let me tell you that we were supposed to be teaching our second lesson at 1. R also told us he was going to provide us with lunch. We sat outside for an hour and half. No lunch. No teaching. At about 2:45, he returns with some mamas and our lunch. He sets up chairs and tables that are about 10 feet from each other. Apparently we aren't allowed to sit near each other. He has special places for Rachel. Mara moved a table and was moving her chair to it and R says, "No, Rachel here." I'm sorry, did Rachel move that table and chair there? No. Mara has a bad knee. She can sit where she likes. Then our lunch comes out. Four fried bananas. I hate any sort of weird banana dish and this one makes me want to vomit. I ate one half of one banana. I think we were all kind of slap happy at this point because Rachel, Mara, and I were just laughing so hard we started crying. Laughing is a sign of craziness in Tanzania, especially among girls. So we're crazy. Then Frank tells us that R says we need to hurry and teach a class because they are waiting on us. I'm sorry, R, you arranged both lunch and this teaching, so you shouldn't have scheduled them at the same time when we did nothing for an hour and a half.

We teach the second class, which was the age group we were supposed to teach. It went really smoothly and we were much happier with that. Then we walked a bit to meet up with the car. We were all super happy to get home, but we had been planning on making guacamole again that afternoon and we didn't have time since we got home about 3 hours after we were supposed to.

But the night would only get better...

Story to be continued after I return from our teaching at the mosque (I'm late...).

"I'm going to be a clinically obese child in Africa."

First, khanga is spelled like that. Whoever spells it konga is stupid (aka, me).

Second, I forgot to mention that I am HIV negative. Probably an important detail. My bruise today is not longer swollen but it is huge. Doesn't hurt as much anymore, but it looks intense. I should take a picture of it.

Third, don't tell any of your teaching partners that you are HIV negative. Especially if his name is Yonas. He's a jokester and really enjoys making inappropriate jokes. First he tells Mara that Daniel (one of the workers for SIC) dropped off condoms at his house for the condom demonstrations... and for Yonas. Then later he asks me about our testing. I said I tested negative. He said he tested negative a year ago and since he hasn't participated in any risky behavior since then, he's still negative. Apparently this means we are able to have unprotected sex.

Today Rachel, Mara, and I went to check out Emmanuelle's house. She lives in a mansion! And they have sinks. All I want in my house is a sink. I love everything about my house, but a convenient place to wash my hands everytime I have to touch a child playing with a dead fish would be lovely. But her baba (father) didn't go to secondary school and he started his own business. It's a super successful hardware store and he lives in a huge house. Emmanuelle was also saying that the gender roles are very different in her house, which is cool. In my house, our mama always serves us and gets us what we need. But E said that her baba often serves them and does the "womanly" stuff. That's so awesome.

After E's house, the four of us stopped at the supermarket to pick up bread. Then we went to the market and got parachichi (avocado), some tomatoes, onions, and pilipili (pepper). Then we went to my house and made some guacamole. Mama Ali (the one who usually cooks for us) did not like it one bit. Mama Halime (the head of the house) said she liked it, but we're not quite sure. Our bibi (grandmother) wouldn't even try it. I think our brother Ali liked it, though. We enjoyed it. We also decided it's probably a bad idea because an entire loaf of white bread is not a good snack. But we're doing it again tomorrow, this time at Rachel's place. I'm looking forward to it. We got really intense with our pocket knives cutting the veggies. We got some real Bear Grylles around here.

I also touch our cats too much for it to be healthy. I'm going to get a serious disease. Mara likes to joke that I'm going to get feline AIDS. Not possible, but some other strange African cat disease is totally possible.

Okay, I'm going to do another post on our daily lives in the near future. Just you wait. It's exciting. I will be providing some serious detail, too. You'll almost think you're here!!

Today We Got Tested For HIV

Today one of the SIC Field Officers, Dhulfa, had arranged a testing at a community event. We all went out and got tested. They used a syringe (not sure how that's spelled) and had to draw the blood out that way. I prefer the American way of inserting a needle connected to a vial and waiting for your heard to just pump the blood in. This guy was pretty good (you couldn't feel him drawing out the blood) but I have a small cut because he grazed my skin with the needle before putting it in AND he went through my vein, so I have a really painful bruise in the crook of my elbow. It's hard to bend. Slightly painful. I had this weird fit of lightheadedness, which I've never had before. Very odd. We decided it's just because I'm dehydrated.

Our homestay family keeps overfeeding us. It's ridiculous. It got to the point where we just couldn't do it anymore and we've been slowly eating less food.

On another interesting note. Africa really sucks for regular bowel movements. I know you all want to know that. But all the volunteers are literally taking bets on when everyone is going to do #2. I like to keep that information to myself, but it's really funny to see how free everyone is about it. It's just normal table talk.

I've memorized the different meows of our two cats. Beggy McBeggerson just sounds desperate. Inbreed/Big Head sounds like he's dying. So I know which cat is at our door when they meow. But we don't let them in because I'm pretty sure we'd die of feline AIDS.

Okay, got to run now. I'll be sure to add more detail later!!

"It's bad when your armpit smells better than your room."

So, we got out groups and our homestays.  I am working with Frank, Jarrod, Rachel, Beatrice, and Mara.  Mara and I are rooming together.  We are living with Mama Halima, Mama Ali, Dodo, Bibi, Ester, Osama, Ali, and some more kids.  Ali and Tony are our brothers.  Tony is in high school and speaks some English.  But mostly our family and us try to communicate using single words and acting things out.

They pretty much think Mara and I are hilarious.  The first night we sat outside with Dodo (who, by the way, is part of some Muslim royal line, the brother of the head of it or something).  He took us outside and Mama Halima said, "Story!"  So we thought we were going to hear a story.  It's silent for a while.  Mara and I are sitting in chairs facing Dodo, who is sitting on this tiny stool.  We started thinking we were supposed to be the ones telling the story.  Finally one of our cats (we have two in our homestay.  One is named Big Head, because his head is super large compared to his body.  The other is called Beggy McBeggerson, because now that he's not terrified of us, he really enjoys being pet/fed.  These are of course names that we made up.  They are not family names for the cats) came outside.  The word for cat is paka and Mara pointed and said "paka!" Dodo laughed.  We then spent the night bonding everytime a cat came by or there were cat fights.  It was really fun.  We watched Mama Ali make the chapati dough.  We learned the word for hippo: kiboko.  

Then we went to bed, where we proceeded to discuss how dirty our feet were and the best way to use the choo (toilet) and brush our teeth.  We both go to the choo together and wait for each other.  We decided this was the best way since the first morning we were there, I went by myself and someone walked in on me, even though I was informed people would always knock, and we should always knock.  Not true.  So now we go in pairs.  Haha.

I think Mara and I will learn a lot of Kiswahili in our house.  It's really fun to try to speak, but also kind of awkward.  We also feel weird in the house sometimes.  We started out eating just by ourselves and someone, usually Mama Ali (Dodo's wife), would serve us.  We felt really awkward and asked Frank to tell them we wanted to eat with the family and they shouldn't feel like they should serve us.  We just made it worse.  Now someone in the family has to wait around to eat with us.  Everything is exactly the same, except someone sits with us.  It's been Dodo or Mama Ali.  We just feel really awkward now.  Plus, when they are there, they just put second helpings on our plates.  Sooo full.  We usually eat a meal and go take a nap, it's so much food.  Now they kind of expect that.  It's pretty funny actually.

This morning we took our first bucket shower.  We were pretty sure our family thought we were getting smelly because they kept asking us if we wanted to wash and we kept saying no.  But Mama Ali was boiling hot water for us and no one else knew about it.  So we were trying to ask our bibi (grandmother) about it and she didn't know.  Then Tony came out (he speaks some English, remember) and we tried asking him.  He looked kind of awkward and was like, "Do you want to shower this morning?"  It was really awkward because Frank had told Mama Ali that we would need water this morning, but it seemed like no one had prepared it.  But then Mama Ali came to the rescue and got our buckets and everything.  I still can't wait for an American shower, but it was nice to be clean.

I just have to say a bit about our bibi.  She likes to tell us different greetings to confuse us.  Then, when we don't know what to respond, she says (in English), "When I say this...  You say this..." filling in whatever she's talking about.  It's really funny.

Rachel and Beatrice live together.  Their mama, Mama Zainabu, works with a women's group and orphans and her family and friends have already set up tons of teachings for us.  We're kind of overwhelmed.  We were supposed to use the first five days to map out our territory and meet with village leaders and survey people.  But we've already had 3 teachings!  It's crazy.  It's really cool that everyone is so excited.  We are trying to set up special hours in town meeting places so people can just come.  It will be things like we will be here at this time every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday and we will have lesson plans and everything, so it will be organized.  We'll see how things work out though.

The last thing I'll leave you with today is the quote that made my blog heading.  We were getting settled two nights ago and Mara opened her deoderant and said, "You know it's bad when your deoderant smells."  Then today, when we took our bucket showers, she took her towel out of its bag and it smelled like mildew, because it had been wet when she put it in.  After her shower, she hung it up on our room and it smelled so bad.  It was funny because I said, "Just stick your head in your armpit, because your deoderant will smell good."  Then Mara was like, "It's bad when your armpit smells better than your room."

That's all for now.  Except we did visit Sara, Sana, and Peery today.  They have a HUGE rural area to cover.  They are about 20 minutes from each other's homestays, which sucks.  But they have a great area.  I don't like being in the town, where we are.  There are too many people and everyone is always watching what you're doing.  I really liked where they were and wished we were out there.

Okay, more later!

"If condoms cost 10,000 Tsh, all the poor people would die."

I thought I'd just tell you all a little about classes.

As I said, orientation is slightly boring. I have spent the last five days coloring unicorns in my coloring book. I'm cool. I do entertain everyone coloring them. They like to watch. It's entrancing.

We do a lot of group work and then get up and present whatever it is we're supposed to present. We do a lot of the same material over and over again, but it's the important stuff. During one presentation, a group was talking about ways of preventing sexual transmission of HIV. One of the ways is condom use. The rest of the class is kind of supposed to ask questions that people might get asked in a real session. Frank asked, "Why are some condoms cheaper than others? Are they worse than the expensive ones?" Sam, who was one of the people presenting, said "If all condoms cost 10,000 shillings, all the poor people would die." It was so funny because he was so straight-faced when he said it. Sara and I were the only ones who heard and we were cracking up. That earned us a look from our teacher, Kate. So worth it though.

I used to sit in the front and take notes. Now I sit in the back. We have a crew. It's usually Sara, Peery, and I and then whoever gets lucky enough to sit by us. Haha. Just kidding. But we always have a good time, anyone we're with. We like to make inappropriate comments at appropriate times. We say ridiculous things. I entertain Emmanuelle with my coloring of the unicorns.

We always have a lot of fun in class though, no matter how long the day is. We've been doing teaching demonstrations and yesterday a group was presenting on relationship skills. The question was, "What do you look for in a relationship?" Frank said, "A big butt." So I countered with, "I think the man should pay for everything." Which, if you saw us all together, you would know was a jab (jabb?) at Frank for saying women should have big butts. I just looked up to see him shaking his head at me. Which is just great. We have a great relationship. Sometimes we like to beat each other up. But really we're friends. Maybe.

It's the same with everyone. We all get along so well and can joke so easily together. Except Yonas/Jonas/John. Whatever comes out of your mouth, he'll respond to. Sara and I are always messing with him. "Sara, Hawk, are you joking me?" Then we start laughing and he says, "Listen me!" It's just so hilarious. He doesn't trust us. He's suspicious of everything we do or say. We love it.

We find out our teaching groups today. It's kind of sad because we'll all be splitting up. We're definitely going to have to meet up on the weekends. It will be interesting to see who we are put with and if they took into account our input. It will all be good in the end. But we'll see.

All right, more to come later!!

Baadai (or Baaday or Baaydai or something... I'm not entirely sure how to spell that...)